Monday, March 20, 2006
Out of Control

My grandpa is in the hospital. He is having chest pains and he's waiting for tests to find out what's wrong. I'm pulling for him, 100%.

I would not be able to bear to lose him. Not now. I went to visit him today and I'm crying right now over the fact that my life would never be the same if he left. But just talking to him, I remembered of how great of a man he is. He was much more interested in what was going on in my life than all the terrible things he was going through. He's amazing.

Situations like this always remind me that I have little to no control over anything in this life. God is in control of it all. So whatever this is, I know it's going to be okay.

Sometimes it's okay to be out of control. With God at the wheel life is a lot more comforting, but he does take some unexpected turns sometimes.

OUT OF CONTROL

What I needed to hear wasn't coming in clear
and what I now know is only partial info
I speak over tempo to put words into motion
you can't stay stagnant with the future that's approching
So where do you stand?
It's either break or be broken.
Forget dry land I'd rather stand in the ocean
and let the waves of devotion roll over me
Irony, I had to suffocate before I could breathe
I'm in a head space I've never been before
ever since my feet hit the shore
I tell you boy it feels good so give me some more
it feels good

It's a bit passionate for your radio
but that's alright though it's good for your soul
and it feels good to be out of control
I said it feels good to be out of control

Now ain't that something adrenaline rushing
and I'm touching the heart of God and adjusting
rather nicely to the feeling that's inside of me alive in me
continually guiding me and surprising me
It's beyond my reach but it's in my grasp
I walk steadfast along a narrow path
Avoiding snares and traps and all else that seems to keep me
from who I need to be right now I'm thinking clearly
and I'm in a head space I've never been before
ever since my feet hit the shore I tell you ha,
it feels good so give me some more
it feels good...

Labels: Erika's Life Updates, Lyrics

Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Things I Knew (and things that I didn't)

Labels: Poetry

Thursday, March 02, 2006
The Heartbreak is Over

Sunlight on my windowpane
Something new running through my veins
Every day is like a new beginning
It's something about the way I'm feeling
When you say you love me

Your words are ringing over and over
Changing everything I thought I knew
I know a love that's true
And it's all because of You
All because of You.

God: I feel Him everywhere and it's wonderful. I was in the dark for such a long time but I finally know who I am and even though I don't know where I am going in this life, I am enjoying the ride.

It should have been such a simple thing to grasp, growing up at church, but I always seem to forget: God loves me. No matter how many times I ignore him, disobey him, treat him like trash he always loves me. Which is incredible, because I've never met anyone in this world who is like that.

I used to be so sad all the time, even if I was always smiling. But all of that is gone now and I am so glad. Depressing poetry can be amazing and extremely touching but it was definitely time for me to outgrow it. I may not have everything figured out yet; there are a lot of things that I'm still unsure of. But all I know: the heartbreak is over.


ON THE RIDE

Life has moments hard to describe
Feeling great and feeling alive
Never coming down from this mountain we're on (mountain we're on)
Always knowing we're gonna be fine
Feeling great and feeling alive
Never coming down from this mountain we're on (mountain we're on)
The view is so clear
and it's crazy up here:
Life is amazing with You on the ride.

Labels: Erika's Life Updates, Lyrics