Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Invisible Girl (Reply)

Well, there is one person out there who this is for, and she knows who she is. 'Cuz really, it's just slightly obvious.

You said that you feel invisible at school, but when it comes to youth you fit in perfectly. For me, it's opposite. I feel totally invisible at our church sometimes, especially at youth. It's like I just don't fit in or something. Actually, sometimes I feel invisible at school too.

The only time I feel that I have a voice is when I'm focused on my music, using it to worship God. When I sing I feel free. It's the one time I am finally in control of anything that happens with me. I get to choose that high note to hit. I get to pick which chords to strum. I get to write the lyrics without anyone else deciding how the melody should go. The rest for me is a ride.

But no one has ever really heard me sing.

.

That's my problem.

.

So I guess until they do hear me sing, see me in my element, no one will ever really know me but God. And I will continue to be the invisible girl. Which, admittedly, is sometimes okay with me. But only sometimes.

I long to have a deep relationship with someone on this planet. I want to tell someone all my secrets, all my thoughts, where I'm at with God: everything! But I just can't. I'm misunderstood, misread, and sometimes misled. And even my pathetic cry for friendship can't break down the walls that cliques have built. Walls that have caused lost friendship and hurt.

COLOR ME LONELY

Color me lonely
A deep and dark blue
There's nothing to say now
There's nothing to do

There aren't any words
To tear down that wall
There aren't any arms
To prevent the fall

There's nothing to stop
The world spinning 'round
There's no one to pick
me up when I'm down

I wish you would look
Beyond the outside
Search for what breathes
The heart that's inside

Then maybe you'd see
What I'm all about
Maybe you'll be the one
To figure me out.

.

Am I going to be posting a best friend applicatin on here any time soon? Not very likely. I already have my Best Friend. But people were not made to be alone. So encourage me, pray for me, and maybe (just maybe) I'll be out this Friday night.

Peace out. Y

Labels: Poetry, Rant